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the scene. loud music. crowds. people getting carded. the people. depends on where you are. preppy thirties. young latinos. whatever. every place seems to have its style and its crowd. try them out. go with a friend. watch people. follow someone with your eyes some time. they act a certain way. talk a certain way. but sometimes if you catch someone at the right moment, they look/act differently. just for a second and probably only with one person. i've seen it before; its neat. seeing someone with their social fences down. when a spot gets stale. move around, regardless of how thick the crowd is. movement makes you something to look at. one thing i suggest-- but, for some reason, never followed (i will change this)-- is if you're looked at by someone you like, look back. then followup.
passive: resond to ads you like. maybe they'll write back.
active: write your own ad and ask what you want for.